Breathe yourself calm
How breathwork can calm your nervous system
8/25/20264 min read
Breathe Yourself Calm: Simple Breathing Techniques to Soothe Your Nervous System
Have you ever noticed that when you’re stressed, anxious or overwhelmed, your breathing changes?
It might become quicker, shallower or higher up in your chest. You may even find yourself holding your breath without realising it.
The good news is that your breath can also work in the opposite direction. By deliberately changing the way you breathe, you can send your body a message that it is safe to slow down.
And you don't need to spend an hour meditating or become an expert in breathwork to experience the benefits. Sometimes, just a few conscious breaths can make a noticeable difference.
Why does breathing affect how we feel?
Our breathing is closely connected to our nervous system – the part of our body that helps us respond to what is happening around us.
When we feel threatened, stressed or under pressure, our sympathetic nervous system – often described as our 'fight or flight' response – becomes more active. Our heart rate can increase, our muscles may tense and our breathing can become faster.
When we feel safe and relaxed, our parasympathetic nervous system becomes more dominant. This is sometimes referred to as our 'rest and digest' state.
One of the beautiful things about the breath is that, unlike your heartbeat or digestion, you can consciously influence it.
So, when life feels a little too much, taking a few slow, intentional breaths can be a simple way of helping your body shift towards a calmer state.
1. The longer exhale
This is one of my favourite techniques to use when you want something simple and soothing.
The idea is to make your exhale slightly longer than your inhale.
Try this:
Breathe in gently through your nose for a count of 4.
Then breathe out slowly for a count of 6.
Repeat for 5–10 rounds.
Don't worry about getting the counting exactly right. The most important thing is that the breath feels comfortable and unforced.
As you breathe out, imagine releasing some of the tension you're carrying.
You can use this technique anywhere – sitting at your desk, before going to sleep, in the car before an appointment or whenever you notice yourself becoming tense.
2. Physiological sigh
If you want something you can use when you need to settle yourself quickly, try the physiological sigh.
Take a gentle breath in through your nose.
Then take a second, smaller breath in through your nose, almost as though you're topping up the first breath.
Then slowly and fully exhale through your mouth.
That's one breath.
Try repeating it two or three times, then return to your normal breathing.
This is particularly useful when you notice yourself feeling tense or overwhelmed. It doesn't need to become another thing you have to 'do perfectly' – simply pause, sigh and allow your body a moment to soften.
3. Box breathing
Box breathing is a lovely technique when your mind feels busy and you want something rhythmic to focus on.
Try:
Inhale for 4
Hold for 4
Exhale for 4
Hold for 4
Then repeat.
You might find it helpful to imagine tracing the four sides of a square as you breathe.
If holding your breath feels uncomfortable, don't force it. You can simply breathe in for 4 and out for 4 instead.
The aim isn't to challenge yourself. It's to create a steady, predictable rhythm that gives your mind something gentle to focus on.
4. Belly breathing
When we're stressed, we often breathe predominantly into our upper chest.
Belly breathing encourages a slower, deeper and more relaxed pattern.
Place one hand on your chest and one on your tummy.
Take a gentle breath in through your nose and imagine allowing the breath to move down towards your tummy. You should feel the hand on your tummy rise slightly.
Then breathe out slowly and allow your tummy to soften.
Continue for a couple of minutes, keeping the breath comfortable and relaxed.
This can be particularly lovely before bed, especially when combined with dim lighting, a warm drink and a few minutes away from your phone.
Remember: less is often more
When it comes to calming breathwork, you don't need to take enormous breaths.
In fact, trying too hard to breathe deeply can sometimes leave you feeling light-headed or uncomfortable.
Think slow, soft and easy rather than big and forceful.
Your breath should feel like an invitation to relax, not another task to accomplish.
And if a particular technique doesn't feel comfortable for you, stop and return to your normal breathing.
Make it part of your day
You don't have to wait until you're stressed to practise.
Try taking two or three minutes in the morning before you start your day, during an afternoon slump, or as part of your evening wind-down.
Over time, you may begin to notice your own breathing patterns and recognise when your body is asking you to pause.
Sometimes, the simplest form of self-care is quite literally right under your nose.
Take a breath. Slow it down. And give yourself permission to pause.
A little practice for today
The next time you notice yourself feeling rushed or tense, stop for a moment.
Put your feet on the floor.
Relax your shoulders.
Breathe gently in through your nose for 4.
Breathe slowly out for 6.
Repeat five times.
Then notice how you feel.
You haven't changed what's happening around you – but you may have changed the way your body is meeting it.
If you are new to breathwork, always practise gently and within your comfort level. Stop if you feel dizzy, light-headed or unwell. Certain breathing practices may not be suitable for everyone, so seek appropriate professional advice if you have any concerns.
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